Monday, July 28, 2008

And They Shall Call Me "FRANK"

Friday I went to the Eagle with Bill, met up with Craig and Luther and some of the others. I had the fortune of discovering the gay man group, Bearforce1, which if you know what a Bear (see #5) is, you can get my amusement of watching these guys dance around in pastel shirts, then water while singing jauntily. I managed to meet the ONE straight there. Going around, like I usually do, I asked this cute guy that if I had a dick, would he suck it... To which he replied NO, because he was straight. He thought it was funny and understood how I might think a guy in a gay bar would be homosexual. Guess those drink specials of 3-for-1's really draw 'em out.

We also figured out my gay name. Luther said something about me talking to more guys in the bar than even the gay guys do. And I'm like: "HELL YEAH, I'D MAKE A GREAT GUY DUDE!" so of course then we needed to figure out a name; at the same time, Craig and I came up with "Frank".

Saturday was divine. Sunday I made guinness pork chops (because all of my yumgasm marinades and sauces had dripped on the grill), we had enough smoke to blow into the next door neighbor's house. The fire alarm went off and two fire trucks came. WHEE!


I once again had a quality weekend with some gays, but Timmy (who went to Bismark Pride, a wholly different experience than
Mpls Pride), had adventures that eclipse mine. Just a big field of gays, camping, getting drunk and having queertastic weekend. They were even selling "jock on a stick," which as you might have imagined is a neon jockstrap, on a stick, tied in the back so it's tighter. Once you have that, what other article of clothing do you really need?

8 comments:

Just Sayin' said...

I think your gay name would be.

John FitzPatrick, or Patrick FitzJohn... Your choice.

I'm just sayin'...

Mike said...

I think your gay name should be Joe Bendover.

But hey, what do I know.

B.E. Earl said...

So Robin Williams, the hairiest man alive, would have been a bear in "The Birdcage".

Got it.

C.Rag said...

Frank,

Are you circumcised?

moooooog35 said...

Frank is your gay name.

Frank is also another name for a hot dog.

Coincidence?

Yeah, probably.

Slyde said...

that is a great line to use in a bar.... but i'm just glad no one has ever used it on me...

Malach the Merciless said...

Hey Franks, stick in back here

Preposterous Ponderings said...

Frank is such a macho name. You must have one really huge dick!