Light Sabers, Roller Girls, and Guy Fawkes

Between Armageddon at work and all my other semi-controlled chaos, I’m just now getting around to the weekend recap. Friday night was one of those nights that can only be put together from texts, myspace comments, picture mail, and stamps on my hands. I think part of the reason for getting blackout drunk was the early start and then some chemical additions that I don’t normally have. I had some delicious pear cider at Old Chicago, and while Jason, Landon and I were drinking there, we noticed what we thought were prostitutes. They were ueber hot, and going around chatting to groups of men, so obviously we thought they must have been propositioning them. No, turns out they were just Coors girls, telling everyone about the new Pale Moon beer. It was awesome, they gave us free samples, (although, them giving us the glass took away some of the fun that comes with acquiring glasses from bars). Pale Moon may smell like woodchips, but it was free, thus tastyriffic!

We went back to Jason’s house, joined up with Calvin Crustitron, and did some crack pipe shots, and I assisted a friend with some chemical acquisitions (unfortunately, Tequila Mockingbird sucks at this kind of thing, and ended up dropping the remainder of it on the sidewalk, BUT amazingly enough, found it the next morning). At some point I remember walking to the bar with everyone, but after that it’s hazy. From the lobster stamp on my hand, I gather I went to Stella’s next, and a couple bars after that. Then from what I am told they stopped letting us into places, so we just went back to Jason’s. IMPRESSIVE!

The next morning, we fixed ourselves up right at the Uptown Bar with tater tots and screwdrivers at 10 am, and sat in the sun watching the lunatics, hotties, panhandlers, and trendy hipsters that passed by. Later I went to the roller derby finals with Legos and the airsoft crew. During pre-drinking at the Local, we saw people in Guy Fawkes masks protesting Scientology. They were not amused with me screaming at them: “SHOW ME YOUR TITS.”
I definitely fell in love with a couple of the hotter roller girls; something about their short skirts, colorful underpants, and violence really rocked my dock. One of the many highlights of the evening was my light saber fight during half time.
A couple of the airsoft guys are married to roller girls (Strawberry Snatchcake and Freddie Kruelgirl), so we went to the after party at the Black Bamboo. There they had karaoke, and I’ll admit that seeing two lesbians sing “Like a Virgin” was seven shades of entertaining.