Friday, May 2, 2008

May's Douchebag Of The Month

I almost didn’t post today because of last night’s rip roarin’ drunkgasm of a thirsty Thursday, that left me slightly intoxicated this morning, and forced me to have the breakfast of champions (mini hashbrowns, sugar free redbull and advil). But, I felt it would be a disservice to hold off on one of the blog’s most sacred events; that’s right, bitches, it’s Douchebag of the Month time!!! WhEeeeeeee……
douchebag
So for May, I think the best candidate I came across was Rev. Jerimiah Wright. Not so much because of all the batshit crazy stuff he said; that was actually entertaining. Some of my favorite topics include (but are not limited to):

  • America is still the No. 1 killer in the world
  • We brought 9/11 on ourselves
  • We believe in white supremacy and black inferiority and believe it more than we believe in God
  • We supported Zionism shamelessly while ignoring the Palestinians and branding anybody who spoke out against it as being anti-Semitic
  • We started the AIDS virus

But those nuggets alone aren’t enough to garner him this illustrious award. It’s the fact that he didn’t keep his mouth shut, and kept spouting off and trying to defend himself that did even more damage than the original statements of douchebaggery. He claimed to be a friend of Obama, but instead he just hurt the campaign. That makes it even shittier. I have a friend running for Congress in one of the local suburbs here, but I have enough sense not to connect him to my blog. And that’s what friendship is all about… not letting your personal shenanigans drag down your friends.

Obama has done what he could to separate himself from Rev. Wright, but the damage is already done. At this point, I think the best thing for everyone involved is for the douchetastic Reverend to team up with
Josef Fritzel, the runner up for May’s Douchebag of the Month. Rev. Wright might benefit from having his douchemongering ass locked in a cellar.

17 comments:

Bruce Johnson said...

I find this whole Rev Wright thing just soooo bizzare. He is obviously and intelligent man and it points out just how much White America knows (or doesn't know) about Black religion in this country.

But for the Rev to make these statments, he has to know that they will be associated with Obama and harm his chances of being elected. The one man that could make the most positive change toward what the Rev. is saying is being hurt by the Rev. remarks. Mr. Wright has to KNOW this, so I have to assume that he does not want to further the cause of black people and in effect, wants to continue the black anxiety / conspiracy mindset instead of moving this ethnic culture forward. Either that, or he is just an attention grabbing douchebag out to further his own ends at the expense of the black community. Either way, he really is a douchbag.

fu said...

Obama should just Tupac his chatty ass

Moooooog35 said...

I thought friendship was about being able to drive in the carpool lane.

If not...then WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?!?!

Jay said...

I used to think that I had a shot at doucebag of the month. But, I could never compete with this guy. I think he's actually jealous of Obama's success and wants to sabotage it.

Anonymous said...

The ole Rev. can't take away Obama's hotness, that's for damn sure. Barrack is fine. I have this crazy crush on him, T-Bird. anyways, you have a great weekend, party hard, drink harder and then come back here and tell me about it!! :) love ya!

Malicious Intent said...

AHHHHHHHHMMMMEEEEEEEENNNNNN Sista Tequila!

Mike said...

I now put Rev. Wright in the same category as Al Sharpton. I only hope he hasn't insured that John McCain will be our next Presidick.

Malach the Merciless said...

Wow, he beat out Frtizl?

Verdant Earl said...

We didn't starts the AIDS virus. Everyone knows a monkey-fucking whore from Haiti did. And by "monkey", I mean George W. Bush.

So maybe we did start it.

Hungry Mother said...

I think the Clintons have been paying Rev. Wrong to undermine Obama.

R.E.H. said...

Well, I gotta say that the topics of choice Rev. Wright offers are nothing short of laughable. Can anyone possibly take this guy seriously?

AngryMan said...

Why hasn't the news media been covering this issue?

billymac said...

i love politics... these guys (and frigid bitch) are way more fucked up than us... makes me feel good.

Roland Hulme said...

What an awesome post! I totally agree with you!

Yep, Wright couldn't have hurt Obama's campaign more if he'd deliberatly tried.

Douche bag.

La sac de douche, comme on dit en france.

Der baggen de douchenstrafen, as ve say in der Deutschland.

FreeOscar said...

This will blow over for Barry it's not that big of a deal compared to cankels & pant suits.
I wouldn't be surprise if there's not a dungeon being built to keep Rev. Wright in for 24 years while he gets anally raped.

Ginormous Boobs said...

That guy isnt just a douchebag...he's a douch nozzle.

none said...

He is a summers eve or maybe a massengil ;)