Monday, April 7, 2008

Skeet Skeet Skeet

First of all, I want to thank everyone who left me birthday comments (whether here or on myspace), presents on their blogs, sent me texts/emails, AND a special thanks goes to the awesome person who sent me a tiara (I cause a ruckus enough when I go out, but the tiara really made the night). You all contributed to me having a fanfuckingtastic birthday. I got off work at 3, Landon was home because he had just got back from Oshkosh, and off we went to Stella’s (where they no longer have free shrimp on Friday’s, which seems a little bait n switchy to me…), then Chino Latino’s and finally Old Chicago. It was then about 6, so we took an intermission while Landon napped, and I worked out and re-hydrated. The Novice came over about 9, so we did pre drinking and got ready to hit downtown Minneapolis. I went out prepared, with a note that had my address on it, and a ten dollar bill (to cover the cab ride from downtown back home to uptown).



The cab driver was sufficiently amused with our chatter on the way there, specifically Landon’s desire to bend this hot milf with a broken foot over her walker and bang her hard. We went to Harvey’s first, where we met up with Camaroon, who hadn’t been out with us for a few months because he’s running for Congress. I won’t link him or use his real name, because I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be efficacious. Also, he’s doing well enough on his own, and he should officially get Democratic endorsement next week.




Anyway, next we went to Bella Notte, where I saw some bachelorette chick who also had a tiara on. I briefly considered fighting her for the honor of who gets to keep their tiara on, but we left soon after. Then we went to The Local, where I met some randoms who bought me shots and kept going on about birthday spankings. This offer was met with adamant refusal. From there we went to Brits, Chambers, and finally Jimmy Johns, and by then I was almost comatose on the cab ride back. It was sweet... I didnt buy any drinks for myself the entire night. But then, who DOESNT love a drunk girl in a tiara??


Saturday was an perfect day to have a birthday, being that it was beautiful and sunny, unlike the rest of the week that had been rainy, windy, and sometimes snowy. So Landon and I walked down to Figlios, then to Stella’s where they had their roof top cafĂ© open finally. Calvin Crustitron came down to make up for douching out and not showing up for the previous night’s shenanigans. Sarah and Joe came joined us, and I got so into the two-for-one honeyweiss with orange slices inside, that I lost track of time and had to run the 4 blocks home to get ready for my evening plans at the Acme Comedy Club. Dinner, drinks and a comedian that didn’t incite my heckling made for an awesome night. Birthday spankings ensued afterwards. If I have more birthdays like this, maybe getting old isn’t so awful.

29 comments:

Leighann said...

Ah, good times!

moooooog35 said...

Sounds fun.

I took the kids to Chuck E. Cheese Saturday, and was asleep by 9:30.

On the bright side, I was able to sustain an erection for almost 10 minutes without the help of Viagra.

This is why we were home from Chuck E. Cheese so early.

They frown on that shit.

Getting old DOES suck.

Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

billymac said...

sweet... what's up with the b-day spanking pics??

Slyde said...

see? those birthdays just keep comming around faster and faster. Dont fight it!

happy birthday!

Captain Flak Paperpants said...

GOD DAMMIT, BITCH, I TOLD YOU THAT APRIL 5th IS MY BIRTHDAY!

GO GET YOUR OWN!!!!!

lotus07 said...

Prepared with "A note and a $10 bill".......you must have been a Girl Scout in a previous life....

Ginormous Boobs said...

Dude, you know how to do it up for your birthday...it makes me want to celebrate mine in MN!

Tequila Mockingbird said...

CAPN: ive told you again and again, i will fight your bitch ass to the death to keep this bday mine.

Ginormous: just because i live in the great white north doesnt prevent me from living life to the fullest and having good times.

TED VELVET said...

sounds like fun. barhop much? all that does is delay intake and waste time. I see you're drinking more beer lately. congrats on that.

Mike said...

Sounds like loads of fun. I spent the weekend battling my 3 year old grand-daughter. I think she won.

All in all, I would have rather been drinking.

Sparkling Red said...

I love the tiara!

katie said...

man, that sounds like one helluva b-day celebration, T-Bird. oh, to be young again. you are a breath of fresh air, my dear. and you know i secretly live vicariously though your hot ass! :)

Glad it was a great b-day! i wish you many many more!!

Hungry Mother said...

Please send the phone number and more photos of the drunk blonde chick. She looked out of it enough to go for my geezer butt.

Tequila Mockingbird said...

Katie: awe, that's so sweet! i get that a lot, people living vicariously through me. it's cool though. i hope i'm as happy and whatnot as you are when i'm 31!

Hungry: she was thoroughly shithoused. she wouldve probably fucked an aids patient after another cocktail

Em said...

Tiaras are awesome! ;) And so are drunken birthdays!

Warped Mind of Ron said...

Hey if you are passing out numbers for the drunk blond send them my way too :)

I wish I was half as outgoing as you when I was your age. You totally Rock.

R.E.H. said...

Awesome fun there! Kinda wish I could've been there to make sure you were being celebrated properly - but it seems those present handled it well!

B.E. Earl said...

I celebrated your birthday by drinking too much strong beer (a selection from Unibroue) and having a lovely crap.

Looks like you had fun too! ;)

Jay said...

Damn, if birthday's are going to be that much fun you should have more than one a year.

Mike said...

The tiara really brings out your boobs!

Malach the Merciless said...

Wow, you eyes are crazy in this, I will be by to perform an excorcism

Beach Bum said...

...maybe getting old isn’t so awful.

When it is compared to the alternative no, it isn't all that bad. But I may be growing older but I'm not growing up. Grown ups are just too damn serious.

captain corky said...

Glad you had a great birthday and know how to celebrate it properly! Can you believe that there are people out there who stay sober on their birthdays? How fucking depressing is that?

C.Rag said...

How many spanking did you get?

buffalodickdy said...

Sounds like you had a good one! I always have been the guy who throws the party, not the guy who gets the party... I'm OK with that!

AngryMan said...

If your Democratic congressional friend needs someone to put a restraining order on you and get a court order to keep his name off your blog, give him my card.

Tequila Mockingbird said...

Jay: goddamn right... ive been considering it. or just wearing the tiara out more so i can scam free drinx.

Mike: everything accentuates my rack.

Malach: yeah, i was too lazy to remove the red eye.

Captain Corky: bunch of holier than thou assholes. just dont know how to have a good time on their birthdays!

c.rag: 24 and one to grow on

Angryman: no, i wouldnt do that to him. he's a good guy, and it would be way awesome if he won... always nice to have someone to call to testify on my behalf in whatever legal jams i might get into

The Doggy Did It said...

Hope you had a great birthday!!

I fell asleep on the couch around 10 while watching Alvin and the Chipmunks.

I am such a rockstar!

Hammer said...

Sounds like a great birthday.

Milfs with walkers...that's pretty funny.