This Will Be a Big Shocker, Folks...

As bloggers, we put ourselves out there to entertain and as a way to reach some sort of catharsis. However, when we open up our lives like we do, people who we never wanted to find the blog, can and sometimes do. For example, Lawyerman’s parents found mine and read the infamous chicken post (the comments were particularly harsh on that one too). It was not the cause of our dissolution, but it did not help a tense situation.

More recently, someone who didn’t know me very well came across the blog (I should probably stop mentioning my blog in passing; it turns out I’m the first hit when you google “douchebag of the month” DAAAAAAAMN YOU GOOOOGLE!), and I totally get how I must seem to someone who doesn’t know me… I look like a raging alchy. And I’m not, but I don’t post the average and boring daily activities I do, so readers only get to hear about my interesting shenanigans (that yes, frequently involve drinking).

So instead of talking about my drunken mini golfing at the Mall of America on Friday night or the burlesque show I attended in NE Minneapolis on Saturday (where I allegedly made out with one of the burlesque girls), I will instead tell of my not as exciting doings.

1. Landon and I went shopping for curtains to replace the Spanish whorehouse curtains (as much as I love random people walking past on the street to be able to see in and watch me doing the elliptical, I think it’s time for a change.
2. My coworker Calvin Crustitron and I are growing clovers we got for a dollar at Target. We’ve been thinking that since they are Irish, maybe they would grow better if we gave them some Guiness or Jamesons. But that sounds more like a home project than one for work.
3. I tried fried pickles for the first time on Saturday at Stella’s; yes, I know it sounds gross, but it was awesome, especially with some ranch dressing.
4. After living with me for a little over a month, Landon has found out exactly how much I shed. Because my hair too curly to brush, it tends to get everywhere. Even though I have never been anywhere near his balls, he said he found a long, curly reddish hair wrapped around his them in the shower. NICE!
5. I started reading Stephen Colbert’s “I am America and so Can You” when he was off the air to get my fix of his “truthiness”, and I’ll definitely recommend it to all of you.
6. I saw a play this weekend, “What’s Done In The Dark”. If it comes near you, check it out.
7. Landon and I are learning how to cook together. This weekend we made veggie beef soup, and it turned out fanfuckingtastic.

So there you have it folks, I’m not THAT off the reservation, and actually do somewhat regular things that do not include drinking. I feel better now, don’t you? I’m glad we had this conversation.